"He's an immigrant who films you when you're not looking...He's Rowdy Rowdy Peeper!"
I ripped this from Dwight's blog, classic. Any single Wesincalgary readers give this guy a shout!
Man is a strange animal...Especially as a woman
Like most males, I like a little action when I can get it. However, like most males, often times it is not as easy a task to assay. Unlike those with two X chromosomes who can get it just about whenever they wish, we have to work a little harder-actually a lot harder. Now I'm no ugly bastard or anything (just ask Wes, he'll tell ya),** but recently I've been having a dry spell. So, I actually considered one of them online dating thingys.
** It's true, Dwight is what I call 'man-pretty', his cheek bones are higher than Courtney Love on Christmas and he speaks in iambic pentameter. **
Well, I was online on one for a grand total of 4 days, and I received nothing of the sort. I had a profile up, my picture was nice, my face was relatively food and grime free, and my profile extolled the virtues of the kind of person I was, etc. Nothing. They have these things called 'smiles', whereby if a woman is interested in your profile, she may leave one, ostensibly to express interest in you. And believe me, it was quite the solicitation, for I literally carpet bombed (no pun intended) every woman that I found suitable, which at this juncture quite honestly was about 80% of them, and I received silence in exchange. Well, that was my $20 worth. What are ya gonna do?......Well, I will tell you what I did...
I did some research on the particular dating company from an article you may find here. By the estimation of the company profiled, they reckon it is 10 males per female online (surprise, surprise). I hadn't quite thought about, but then I decided to conduct my own experiment. I posted an ad, not as a male but as a female. I included such salacious details as a height of 5'9", I was blonde, 27 years old, and mentioned that I was looking for nothing serious, just some fun, new in town, blah,blah, blah, and mentioned that I spoke Croatian and Polish, to sweeten the pot some more (what guy doesn't have Eastern European fantasies?). As for a picture, I didn't include that, just to create some mystery. Well, it has been 24 hours since the profile has been up, and thus far I have received 13 messages from potential suitors. Without a fuckin' picture, for chrissakes! There was one fella who was speaking to me in my native tongue (polish, you will recall).I don't know what the fuck he said, but I'll bet he was a nice guy. There was another guy, who thought I sounded 'really cool', I guess based upon my 56 word profile blurb. Wow, ESP as well. What woman wouldn't be impressed? I am tempted to write back, but I think I will see how long this goes before some of them recognize that a) a picture may not be forthcoming-ever or b) someone perchance sees this blog, or the above article link and sez "..wait a minute....there might not be woman on here at all!" In fact, when I was on the above mentioned website in the 'males seeking chicks to fu....' er, I mean 'seeking female companionship' section, I saw a picture of a well equipped woman whom I recall seeing in a sex mag...er..I mean that my friend Aaron showed me in a sex mag, and that kinda put the bug in my ear.
My advice? Save your money and go out and spend the same amount on drinks and go looking the old fashioned way. At least that way you can tell how good that girl's Croatian is. Or her Polish for that matter.
posted by Dwight at 11:32 AM
Man is a strange animal...Especially as a woman
Like most males, I like a little action when I can get it. However, like most males, often times it is not as easy a task to assay. Unlike those with two X chromosomes who can get it just about whenever they wish, we have to work a little harder-actually a lot harder. Now I'm no ugly bastard or anything (just ask Wes, he'll tell ya),** but recently I've been having a dry spell. So, I actually considered one of them online dating thingys.
** It's true, Dwight is what I call 'man-pretty', his cheek bones are higher than Courtney Love on Christmas and he speaks in iambic pentameter. **
Well, I was online on one for a grand total of 4 days, and I received nothing of the sort. I had a profile up, my picture was nice, my face was relatively food and grime free, and my profile extolled the virtues of the kind of person I was, etc. Nothing. They have these things called 'smiles', whereby if a woman is interested in your profile, she may leave one, ostensibly to express interest in you. And believe me, it was quite the solicitation, for I literally carpet bombed (no pun intended) every woman that I found suitable, which at this juncture quite honestly was about 80% of them, and I received silence in exchange. Well, that was my $20 worth. What are ya gonna do?......Well, I will tell you what I did...
I did some research on the particular dating company from an article you may find here. By the estimation of the company profiled, they reckon it is 10 males per female online (surprise, surprise). I hadn't quite thought about, but then I decided to conduct my own experiment. I posted an ad, not as a male but as a female. I included such salacious details as a height of 5'9", I was blonde, 27 years old, and mentioned that I was looking for nothing serious, just some fun, new in town, blah,blah, blah, and mentioned that I spoke Croatian and Polish, to sweeten the pot some more (what guy doesn't have Eastern European fantasies?). As for a picture, I didn't include that, just to create some mystery. Well, it has been 24 hours since the profile has been up, and thus far I have received 13 messages from potential suitors. Without a fuckin' picture, for chrissakes! There was one fella who was speaking to me in my native tongue (polish, you will recall).I don't know what the fuck he said, but I'll bet he was a nice guy. There was another guy, who thought I sounded 'really cool', I guess based upon my 56 word profile blurb. Wow, ESP as well. What woman wouldn't be impressed? I am tempted to write back, but I think I will see how long this goes before some of them recognize that a) a picture may not be forthcoming-ever or b) someone perchance sees this blog, or the above article link and sez "..wait a minute....there might not be woman on here at all!" In fact, when I was on the above mentioned website in the 'males seeking chicks to fu....' er, I mean 'seeking female companionship' section, I saw a picture of a well equipped woman whom I recall seeing in a sex mag...er..I mean that my friend Aaron showed me in a sex mag, and that kinda put the bug in my ear.
My advice? Save your money and go out and spend the same amount on drinks and go looking the old fashioned way. At least that way you can tell how good that girl's Croatian is. Or her Polish for that matter.
posted by Dwight at 11:32 AM
posted by WesinCalgary @ 11:09 PM
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